Wednesday, November 15, 2006

A soul-searching reply to a simple question..

A few days ago, Ascribo, of 'Thinking Aloud' ( posed a challenge for me.. He 'tagged' me.. whatever that means!.. As I understand it, if you get 'tagged', you will be asked a question (or a number of questions) by the person who tagged you.. These are often deep and searching questions, and their answers, I suppose, are meant to reveal about you a lot more than you perhaps want to reveal!..
In my case, the tagging question was:
"Which of your qualities you want your child to have, and which of them you do NOT want him to have?"

Now, on the face of it, this seems like a simple question.. surely, I can recognise some qualities in myself that I want my child to inherit.. or can I???...

I must say, it wasn't too difficult to identify the traits that I wouldn't want to pass on to my children.. I possess certain qualities that, for the benefit of the human gene pool, best die with me!... but let's not dwell on those too much!..

I tend to be quite forgetful.. I always maintain that I have a brain like a sieve!... My memory is as good as the piece of paper in my hand (nowadays, as good as my PDA!..).. In other words, if it is not written down (nowadays, jotted down in my PDA), then it will be forgotten!..

Also, I am messy and untidy, to the deep annoyance of my obsessively tidy wife!.. I have a sign on my office wall, saying: 'A tidy desk is the sign of a sick mind'... Need I say any more?!..

I am not very organised.. I tend to be a bit of a 'scatter-brain'.. I often start on a task, and find myself digressing, and getting involved in a hundred-and-one other matters, leading to confusion and delays.. Some kind souls might call this 'multi-tasking'.. but if I were to be truthful, I would call it 'avoidance tactics'!.. Interestingly, this only happens when I am forced to do administrative tasks, paperwork (which I loathe with a passion!..), or house work.. Thankfully, I always manage to maintain focus when dealing with clinical matters, mostly because I enjoy what I do so much, and not because of any great brain powers!..

I have a habit of postponing tasks that I hate... If I had to tell one of my kids off for something they've done, I would keep finding excuses to do it 'tomorrow'!.. I always end up handing in my Tax Returns form within (almost literally) hours from the deadline (God bless on-line applications!..). I somehow try to convince myself that if I ignore those tasks long enough, they would simply go away!.. Sadly, they don't.. and I should be old enough to know that!!...

On the good side, I am a hardworking and motivated person.. I have managed, against some steep odds occasionally, to maintain my sanity and my focus, and achieve things that I am very proud of..

I am a very tolerant person.. I always try to see the good in people, and find excuses for their acts.. (even though some of those closest to me disagree, and even though that trait had certainly affected me adversely over the years, I still feel it is a good trait..). Nevertheless, I become a vicious monster if any harm were about to befall my loved ones..

I am (usually) pleasant and sociable, and it takes a lot to make me angry.. but believe me, you don't want to be around when I am!..

I think I am caring and thoughtful, and I would go out of my way to help those who need my help..

I believe I am an honest and principled person, with a high sense of duty and purpose.. Now that is a trait that I would love to pass to my offsprings...

After writing all that, I paused a bit, and thought.. What traits have I actually passed on to my children??.. Let's see...

From the outset, let me tell you that I have three absolutely delightful children, whom I absolutely adore.. and although they are so different in many way, they are remarkably similar..

  • All three are very hardworking individuals.. They seem to thrive on challenges, and they give their best when under pressure.. Check

  • All three are highly principled and honest. They would say what they think, and they would stand steadfastly by their beliefs.. Check

  • Each in his/her own way, they are very caring and selfless.. Each of them would do anything to help others, even complete strangers.. Check

  • All three are very pleasant and sociable.. (although they do somewhat vary on the sociability score..).. and by the way, all three have a remarkable ability to sulk!.. Check.. on both accounts!

  • Much to the annoyance of their mother, they are all messy and untidy.. I can't think where they get that from!...

  • My children are proud of who they are... They all have a highly developed sense of belonging, and a deep love for their roots, something that my wife and I have tirelessly instilled in them.. (I know.. this is not an inherited trait.. but at least it is something that I can get the credit for!..)

Well, for someone who professes to being a private person, I am not doing too bad here!.. Here I am baring my soul, warts and all.. (and it's not a pretty sight, anyway!..).. Nevertheless, the exercise made me realise, yet again, how lucky I am, and how blessed I have been to have such great children..

So, for that alone, thank you very much, Ascribo...

(Photo by SB: A lilly in my garden)


abufares said...

Great post.
You might be as honest as a 6th grader but that is the exact quality which made your essay great.
Thank you for dropping by my blog and for giving me the pleasure of reading a little bit in yours.

Ascribo said...

Dear SyrianBrit,

Thank you for taking the trouble of replying to my tag! That was indeed a wonderful reply!

I have to admit that I felt like looking in a mirror. In a way, I believe that all human beings are similar! And sometimes when you read about what somebody else does it's too easy to say: me too!

But nevertheless, I can say I'm good in procrastination (which I inherited from my own father), I have a very untidy desk, and I can say I'm a tolerant person. I can't say I have either a good or a bad memory, But I truely believe that the good memory is the one that forgets!

That last part you wrote about your children is a great idea...I bet you feel pleased to have passed such wonderful traits to your children. I hope they'll all be great in their way.

Thanks again for your soul-searching reply. Keep up the good posts!

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